i'm really sick and tired of all the tricks that you're playing on me.
like how you dangle a piece of meat in front of a poor hungry puppy, and when it almost got it, you decide to cruelly deprive it.
just to test it, you say.
or maybe, why don't let's try a new thing.
why not lay out all your cards on the table for once?
then i won't have to keep falling down again and again.
it's getting quite hard to stand up, especially so after you've pushed me down so many times in a row.
so i can take things in my stride, prepare myself for more tricks to come.
i know, people say it's all about the mindset.
like how one can grow stronger when all these happens.
but all i can say is that you've only made me numb to one thing;
and that's getting up.
i said before, don't let me go in, and then push me right out, slamming the door in my face.
cause that's what you just did.
that's what you love doing don't you?
or am i wrong.
you say, don't lean on myself, but tell me. how can i lean on you?
when its you that have been pushing me down again and again.
can't you see that i'm trying?
or am i, in your eyes, nothing more than a mere speck of dust in the universe.
i know- you'll say i have no one else to blame but myself.
don't look at me with those eyes.
cause right now, in this moment, i see nothing in them.
nothing at all.